rigorouse austerities

"Exceptional mental capabilities may be achieved through genetic inheritance, the use of herbs as prescribed in the sacred texts, recitation of incantations, rigorous austerities and through that state of mind which remains one with its object without distractions (samadhi)." 4.1 Desikachar translation

Iyengar translation of sutra 4.1: "Accomplishments may be attained through birth, the use of herbs, incantations, self-discipline or samhadi."
Iyengar specifies that this is about different means of spiritual accomplishment.

Well my well-being in the world is contingent on my spiritual growth. So this is an important sutra to me personally. I don't think I'm genetically more capable than anyone else to pursue a spiritual life. Then again this disease, I genetically inherited, made me reach a bottom in self-reliance pretty quick, so maybe thats a sort of genetic predisposition?! First good thing ever about this crappy disease. The use of herbs... just the thought scares me so much I move to the next part of the sentence. Recitations and rigorous austerities seems to be the way for me. Not, that I have any power in myself to "be" rigorouse, but since I've just showed up on the path, I seem to be given "rigorous austerities" in my everyday by my greater power. In no way, does it become a rigid path, but a frame of stability in my practice, that grant me so many gifts, working meditation, prayer, contemplation, yoga-asana-practice, inventory (yamas and niyamas) in my every morning, my every evening and precious contact to a loving fellow-journey-mates in between, just makes a jenni-variant of rigorous austerity happen in my life. Grateful for this.

This week I'm moved to adjust asana using breath - I seem to correct too much when I think "muscle power". As a teacher give room and place for working towards moving with conscious contact to the inner body. I've started to read mr. Iyengars book "light on life" and was inspired here. I love how my master starts us up in sitting pose, and when the body is seated, he says "now, wait for the inner body to settle" It makes so much sense and is a very concrete experience for me.
Namasté
Jenni

Reach beyond the confines of oneself

I just love the challenge of this sutra!
the foundation is the understanding of the mind as a storehouse for distinct individual experience. "The function of the mind is limited to the individual to whom it belongs. Thus the mind becomes an isolated fortress, resisting all entry."
Desikachar translates the sutra 3.38:
"By enquiring into the cause of this rigid situation binding the mind to the individual, and examining the means of relaxing this rigidity, there is a great potential for an individual to reach beyond the confines of himself."
By working with these suggested disciplines for example pranayama and keeping the mind clean, "the mental activity can be extended to influence others". Desikachar exemplifies it as practical in the teaching situation.

To this I say - ok
I can relate to it this way; When I'm in a long time relationship I get more and more free from "wrong understanding" of my partner, I slowly get more and more clear insight into this persons universe and mind. This is due to yamas and niyamas work in the relation as well as each of the persons in the relation own personal inventory and unfolding.
When I'm experiencing that I'm safe and protected I get to challenge the rigidity of my mind and the limitations dissolves from inside slowly expanding the limits from the inside.
This is also where I get to experience being more than just an individual, or experiencing we are one or being part of something bigger. These experiences are the most valuable ones for me. Today I know I need them to live authentically and in accordance with my truth. I need to have a teacher who also have done the journey, I need to have many fellow-passengers to share the experience with.

In asana work (and thereby every situation in life) I have two types of understanding the "aha" experience, and the "dimmer" where I get to see the lights turned on slowly.
My literature (other than sutras) now tells me that understanding is a feeling. Nothing else. I can relate to this.
If the limit between two individuals minds, really goes away and there can be "true understanding" between persons is not important. But me sensing the feeling of being understood or understanding is great, but maybe just another color on the "palette of feelings".

I get a little dizzy when I think about how big the universe is, and I get the same weird feeling thinking that there maybe never is any understanding or meaning to it all, other than what we experience or project unto it....
So for this week, reach beyond the confines of oneself, opening and relating.
Maybe connecting or partner work?

Life is wonderful :-)
Namste
Jenni

my inner friend :)

Sutra 3.24 (3.23 Desikachars counting)
“Different qualities such as friendliness, compassion and contentment can be enquired into through samyama, Thus, one can learn how to strengthen a chosen quality” (Desikachar translation) In the same way as a mental or physical skill can be obtained.

“[The sadhaka] gains moral and emotional strength by performing friendliness and other virtues towards one and all.” (Iyengar translation)
Iyengar writes that the practice of friendliness, compassion and benevolence keeps the consciousness free from desire, anger, greed, lust, pride and envy. This disposition of the mind creates a graceful disposition of the heart.

How do I relate to this?
I relate this sutra to my daily inventory-practice, where I ask my self how the yamas and niyamas have been unfolded in my day.
In my yoga posture practice, I relate this sutra to how, asana to me, symbolizes all action in every day, and how I get to develope patience, loving kindness or acceptance in my relation to the asana and my human limitedness or amazement today :-)

What is my experience?
The sutra reminds me of starting to do the inventory many years ago gave me insight into being innocent. This last year with the yamas and niyamas, the inventory given me knowledge of where I'm consciously aware of for example "being moderate" or "being considerate". These inventories and moments of meditation on my actions also have the effect that I sometime during my day consciously get in touch with the idea - "ok, I'm listening and not talking here - this is me practicing "being moderate" today"...

This inspires me to go for working with the attitude of being friendly and with my inner friend. Both in my personal practice but also as a teacher..
My mind works with compassion to me - giving me a voice that says "Oh, honey" in a loving motherly way, really nice and comforting and I get to feel accepted.
"Do not listen to friends when the inner friend says: Do this!” (Gandhi)
Namasté
Jenni Saunte

a love relationship to reality

Iyengar translation, sutra 3.18; ""Through direct perception of his subliminal impressions, the yogi gains knowledge of her previous lives"

When Iyengar writes and uses the Hindu concepts of "past and present" lives. I can relate, today.
It is not so much tied up in the death of my body. I actually know something about death and birth going on in my lifetime. The death of an old role, like "wife" she had to die or transcend being divorced. “Daughter” has died many deaths, in order for me and my mum to have a healthy present relationship. "Mother" and co-parent have to die several deaths, the kids and our circumstances and the relation to their father changed so drastically that death and birth is the most accurate description of the process. Going from being a student to being an employee was a death and a birth.

At my last sessions with Godfrey Devereux he insisted to stay on his mat and not play along in the "ending-story" of the class. "There are no endings" well maybe there are deaths, I've experienced this total transformation of mind: I suddenly see the world as I never did before. Maybe "detachment" is a death, death of an old idea or an old story... Maybe awakenings are births, something that dramatically changes the whole perspective and living afterwards.
To me it makes sense to play along and call it an "ending of the class" even doing it consciously as an symbolic act (to see clearly I'm playing). This is the same reason that makes “celebrate new years eve”, as if there is an ending of a year and a start of a new year, meaningfull – to play symbolically. These things that I do, isn't a reflection of my truth or beliefs but recognition of death and birth in a symbolical way. Celebrating them, separated from when they occur to me or my family as human beings.

"Samyama on one's tendencies and habits will lead one to his/her origins. Consequently, one gains deep knowledge of one's past." The same sutra 3.18, translated by Desikachar.
I have been doing daily inventory for 4-5 years. The last year it's been with the yamas and niyamas as inventory-model. It gives me insight into me, it brings perspective and proportions - not a bad thing and; Yes! very deep. This also relates to the asana-work. Doing the same asanas, daily, for about three months in a row, gives me deep knowledge of my habits and tendencies, but like with my inventory I don't enjoy the knowledge as much as seeing what this knowledge gives me - balance, strength, flexibility, lightness and wellbeing, comfort, contentment.
This is how I relate to the words of Desikachar:
"We learn how our behaviour and personal characteristics developed and what events in the past influenced our attitudes, likes and dislikes."
Or in Iyengar's words: "pains and pleasures experienced in present life as a result of good and bad actions in past lives"

Iyengar writes that: "When we see in truth, we see directly "independent of memory, and feelings of joy and sorrow""
This gets turned around for me into a guideline: The things in my life I'm not emotionally reacting to, is the things I'm closest to the truth about.
And :-)
When I’m emotional excited/sad/angry and on a “very important” mission – I might not be in contact with the most truth there is… Good guideline to wait until the wave have crusted and is retracting… I know this is true for me. I know how it feels when the story about "it is soo important!!" lets go and there is suddenly a possibility to move and change and; unlike nothing else, a sense of being real. After I started to have these experiences I've developed a passionate love-relationship with reality - loving it above all else - even when it hurts. (I'm done painting my red flags green - thanks for these words)
Namsté
Jenni Saunte

subtle, internal, intimate and subjective

Sutra 3.7 Desikachar translation “Compared to the first five components of yoga (sutra 2 – 29) The next three (sutra 3 – 1,2,3) are more intricate.” All my texts sees the first five aspects of yoga to be about; our attitude (action) to our environment (yama), our attitude towards us self (perception)(niyamas), practice of body exercise (asana), practice of breathing exercises (pranayama)and restraint of the senses (pratyahara). Iyengar writes about them all that they are cleansing and purifying practices, this is interesting to me. I’ve been given the guideline of uncover, discover, discard, with the promise that everything I truly am and everything that I need to be will still be there after discarding as good as I can :-) Or maybe in yoga-discourse, to be new, cleansed and purified…

Well they all write about how subtle and internal the last three aspects of yoga are.

Intricate, I need to look up, it means; “having many complexly interrelating parts or elements”. So I move on to Iyengars text, which gives me the words I can relate to: “dharana, dhyana and Samadhi are more subtle, internal, intimate and subjective practices.” It’s about the inner layers, the intelligence, the consciousness and the soul – all very close to the spiritual heart.

Yoga asana and pranayama can be a meditation and have these aspects. Have you tried to have a teacher that just strengthens you in your own rhythm, your own true path? Well I have, and this is what I relate to when I hear about these intimate, subjective and subtle aspects, when I’m with a good teacher who is not trying to control – then my experience of these subtle qualities comes fourth. Beautifully.

Love and light
Jenni

every end is a new beginning...

We are at the end of chapter 2 :-) and I’m at the end, having my last class at my old work-place and at the same time moving into the newborn yoga-space at Yogacentralen.dk
The last sutra 2.55 “Then the senses are mastered” (Desikachar translation), can seem so little, but oh! What a long way to go – to let go of the “needs” and the “must haves”, the “I don’t wanna” and the “it hurts”.
But when it all is done – by the practice of yoga, then this sutra promises us total freedom from being driven by our senses. “The senses cooperate in the chosen enquiry instead of being a cause of distraction.” (Desikachar)
Chapter 2 have brought up the self inventorying, the practice of the body and the breath, the art of living together in society and the cleansing acts to impurities. How to get focused and how to maintain balance.
Now we can move toward “the internal quest of yoga” (Iyengar)

Maybe that’s the walk of the last seven years of teaching… From construction work, in some kind of control trying to build up poses, to go for the nuances, to let go of the control and be of service to the group as a teacher, to discover how impurities –wrong sayings, tensions or disturbance from outside (or my head) – get cleansed, not by me, but by focusing into the practice we are working with –right here right now!
More and more the nuances appear to me, the subtle differences that make a world change.
More and more I get to step into a certainty of teaching, which is evolving through me and to be a god enough teacher is perfect(tak Winnicot). Always improving is true, not a threat, a promise of there is more :-)

Things are changing in so many ways for me, and I can’t control them, I can’t fix them and it’s not about me. It just is. Welcome!

I wish I could tell you that “I” control my senses – this is just not my experience. I do relate to this sutra, as a sadakha (aspirant) I feel that yoga, the power of daily practice and the power of this practice masters my senses. That my senses follow along and I become more whole, more unified.
But I know several yoga-teachers that have the experience that they can master their senses – to this I say: “beautiful!! – good on you!”

Being free is my focus. Every ending is a new beginning is my focus and this is written to you with paint-spots on my fingers – from painting the lovely yoga room, where we can meet and get access to some of this caring, harmonious power of yoga!
Namasté
Jenni Saunte

awakening and evening review :-)

Desikachar translation: In the state of yoga “Then the breath transcends the level of the consciousness” sutra 2.51. I love that he writes “It is not possible to be more specific” Yes! Gotta go there, gotta try, do, experience -not all this talking. Can’t learn to surf by watching the tv… go, do, try, experience. And it is a language-philosophically-logic fulfilment; not trying to explain what is beyond consciousness.


"The fourth type of pranayama transcends the external and internal pranayamas, and appears effortless and non-deliberate" (Iyengar translation, sutra 2.51)

I relate this to "being breathed" instead of being the "breather". Iyengar writes that this state goes beyond the ordinary pranayama retention and conscious contact to the breath. He writes about the experience of an awakening and the experience of being penetrated by "the light of intelligence" to our innermost being.

My focus will be on awakening; to live as awakened as ever possible in every situation, every relation. Morning as a focal point, this is really needed after my long journey I have had problems starting up my morning routine (kids still sleeping and Copenhagen still sleeping). Right now, thinking about awakening a big yawn comes to me, the picture of a cat waking up and stretching the back - so some long stretches will be included.

I will take some space here to write about my evening review. For a month (or 47 days) I've been relating to the yamas and niyamas before I go to sleep in the evening.
You can see the "evening-review-format" here.
These are some halfway reflections:
I love writing about how consideration have been a part of my day. I love discovering that it usually is a part of my day. I don't think, however, that my focusing on this makes me more considerate...
Often the considerate experiences are the same as the unfolding of "being at service", but not always...

"Resisting desire" have turned into the same as "moderation", since living with my desires as the driver, lack moderation in all kind of ways. I also think this change of meaning has something to do with not having a longing for other peoples stuff or stuff, this haven't been a big part of these 47 days :-) This is an old experience with writing reviews every day, if the question/stimuli don’t relate the inspiring level turns the question into something that does ring a bell (living moderation)

"cleanliness" and "the removal of impurities" could be seen as the same thing, but to me it have been turned into - cleanliness practical hygienic actions - spiritual life as karma yoga or spiritual life as the servant... and removal of impurities as actions or situations that cleanses mind, unfolds pure being, innocence, truth...

I love that work and study is something on my agenda every day - and the whole idea of vacation is abnormal, fit very well with my experience of how to live and not loose sight of "the goal".

The two non-yama related questions: "What did I put into the stream of life today?" and "How have I unfolded unity with my past and how have I lived meditation and visions for today?" are old questions in my review but what power they bring!! Presence of my meditations purpose and presence of becoming more whole more in unity. It was good for me to add these two questions.

I've been reading about the seven deadly sins and the seven virtues :-) and I must say I think the yamas-niyamas got it all. For example, the check into the "moderation" kind of includes all of it :-)

So this is it for now -
I'm moving my classes after 6½ year into a new baby yoga place here in Copenhagen: Yogacentralen You are allways welcome!
Namasté
Jenni Saunte

Read more about Yogacentralen at: http://www.yogacentralen.dk/ and http://www.facebook.com/Yogacentralen

removing impurities

2.43“The removal of impurities allows the body to function more efficiently” (Desikachar translation)
To me; the removal of impurities refers to my daily practice – body refers to physical existence “being” in this form and efficiently is measured against (towards :-) my authentic inner guidance and meaning (to be happy joyous and free). Iyengar gives me some extra translation on “tapasah” as the ascetic devotion, and self-discipline. In these days self-discipline is out of my hand, it’s not my business, I can’t make me pure :-) I just do the dishes and the practice and follow the next direction and reality takes care of the rest.
My (small) self cannot discipline my (small) self – there is need for an other instrument – I guess spirit (grand self) is a good one! All this small and grand from the sutra about the God-spark in all of us being the big self and the little self being the ego who is part of human existence.

So this week practice will be about removing impurities (rotations, conversions, pranayama, oh… everything can do it) and lets look at the results in practice and measure our efficiency – why we do yoga.
Love

I'm the practitioner not the propeller

“The result of contentment is total happiness.” (Desikachar translation)
This is what I read: when I get a practice over a longer time, with the yamas and the niyamas I get cleansed and clarity unfolds. Then contentment comes out of being clear and on this path, and out of contentment comes this total happiness or “supreme happiness” as Iyengar calls it.
It is granted, because … I’m the root of my own troubles and when the cleansing process puts this “I” in perspective something else than ego can fill up time and space..
Iyengar writes about the propelling power of the tapas, the devoted practice, which will propel the practitioner into a transformation. This is a part of being on a path of concentration which makes self-study (inventory) possible and leads towards God or reality or what you understand (or don’t understand) as a higher power.

The practitioner is not the propeller neither is the practitioner the power that drives the propeller. This is given through practice. I’m the practitioner. That’s it. Everything else is a gift. I’m the observing receiver of this gift. Thanks. Tak.

Now, my teaching is influenced to be about seeking the contentment and not trying to force the asana but enjoy the force that starts up in every asana by just meeting up on the mat and follow instructions.
Namasté
Jenni

cheerful and benevolent :-)

2.41 “When the body is cleansed, the mind purified and the senses controlled, joyful awareness needed to realize the inner self, also comes.” (Iyengar translation)

When I experience “clarity of mind and body”, do I feel joy? Yes. Not exaltation or bubbly but… Joy, as being free, light and at ease. When I move away from this clear centre, do I experience pain? Yes. I once heard a wise man say that pain is only a signal to guide us back into centre (the broad highway)

And Iyengar passes on the promise that “When the consciousness is cheerful and benevolent, the seeker becomes ready to receive the knowledge and vision of the soul.” I know that insights that come to me, when I’m cheerful or benevolent, reminds alto more about the words of the wisdom literature.

We are halfway through the sutras and I’m giving an event to celebrate this. It will be about subtleness and cheerfulness and benevolence. Yoga, meditation and fellowship. I look forward to it.

Love jenni

guidelines about cleanliness

Sutra 2.40 “When cleanliness is developed, it reveals what needs to be constantly maintained and what is eternally clean. What decays is external. What does not is deep within us.”

I discover I have guidelines about cleanliness, how often I shower, brush my teeth, how and when I do laundry, how my living areal is kept clean, how my minds jumping and messing things up- is inventoried, amends gets done and how often I do these things.
The guidelines have not been passed down or pointed out to me but aroused from a trial and error over many years. What are your guidelines on keeping clean (body and mind)?
It’s not unimportant. Iyengar points out that the cleanliness of body and mind creates a good temple for the seer, the dweller deep within us. And Desikachar hands down the promise of getting freed from attachment to outward things will get reduced. Thank God! As I wrote last week, these attachments hurt…
Namasté
Jenni Saunte

right communication=there's been some wrong communication here...

Sutra 2.39 – but before I write this I kind of glanced down the “paper” and saw me going from 36 to 38 hmm let me look into this..

Ups – what I’ve called 2.36 seems to be 2.37 Soo… Hmmm I guess this will be a little loop –a pertinent one..
Because, my dears – sutra 2.36 states “When the sadhaka (the practitioner) is firmly established in practice of the truth, (her)his words become so potent that whatever (s)he says comes to realization.” (Iyengar translation)
And then he moves into a cellular plane, where all the cells have to agree, for something to be a truth – and I actually don’t have a problem with that – my body knows when there are no cells opposing. Often it sound like “we all want to play” my inner nun, kid, fame fatale, professional, grey mouse and so on – they all agree to play :-)
but oh! It hit’s me… right communication. The only right communication, I know this week; is to be as true to the now and my ideals in the present as I can be… I can’t make them communicate, so that I recognize love and respect, and I cannot communicate as they seems to wish… But being true to the most loving, respectful and honouring I know, seems to be right communication to me this week.
(just a little check in)
“One who shows a high degree of communication will not fail in (her) his actions” (Desikachar translation) I get to love my communicating skills through this week, and to realize I cannot do it as (a Buddha) perfect as I would love to, and exactly that is perfect!! In mercy, I communicate in mercy.
When I love what I say -I get to act on what I say.
When I’m in truth (attha – here and now) what I could have done with an asana or what might be possible tomorrow disappears – then I get to act in success. In the now!
Namasté
Love and light
Jenni

on moderation

Ultra short
I have tiredness swimming around in me…
Desikachar translation sutra 2.38 “At its best, moderation produces the highest individual vitality”
I relate strongly to this even though my experience with feeling “alive” or “vital” is ego-experiences and have very little to do with moderation :-) too much of anything surely doeas give problems (just gave up eating a whole litre ice cream :-)
Iyengars translation goes toward a discussion about continence, celibacy here and chastity. I love his writing “The life-force which finds sexual expression also serves to find the warmth of our emotions, the passion of our intellect, and our idealism.”
Love and light
Jenni

now about stealing :-)

Now about stealing :-) sutra 2.36 continues to unfold the yamas. I’ve found myself in class to pass the yamas along as: non violence, truthfulness, not stealing, moderation in action and non greediness. I know it’s not the abbreviations that Desikachar and Iyengar uses, but translated from English to Danish and now back into English – this is what happened :-)
Iyengars translating sutra 2.36: “When abstention from stealing is firmly established, precious jewels come.” And Desikachar writes about being trustworthy and gaining confidence.

It makes me remember the feeling of honouring my sources, and passing along the yoga-tradition, in my class. Sometime I honour a teacher and dedicate a whole class to this lineage of teaching; sometimes I use precious time in class to talk about differences between traditions or just passing along, from what tradition a specific movement came to me.
This makes me a less important part of the deal and the tradition stands out. But even if I gain less “ego-boost” out of class I get to be rich in “being part of” tradition and rich in safety and protection by traditions trial and error that’s been going on for centuries…

This sutra also reminds me about stealing ideas, opinions and values from others. Pretending to know (steal knowledge) or to have an opinion, robs me; even though I seem to be rich in wisdom-treasure and personality; it robs me – when I stop this stealing and simply starts to say: “I don’t know” I get to receive the precious jewel of wisdom and knowledge and the precious jewel of no opinions peace :-) ever tried that peace? I can recommend it!!!

Now I’m beat. Dead meat-as we said in my teenage years :-)
God night and a good brad new week!